Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
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