But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize
