I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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