Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
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