wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize