the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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