Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
