Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
