i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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