I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Randomize
