would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
foreskin is a definite game changer
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
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