Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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