I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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