home. puking in laundry basket.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
