So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
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