Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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