normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize