there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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