Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
