if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
