stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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