wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Randomize
