Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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