Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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