Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize