why didn't you poke me back
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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