i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
