Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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