how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
