Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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