your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
In other news, I just burned my penis
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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