i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
