I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
