I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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