he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Randomize
