evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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