is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
