i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
