you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
