I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
We need to rekindle our bromance
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
