Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
barbara walters just said penis...
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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