well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
What are you gunna do with your life today
put it back together
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
