Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Randomize
