have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
