dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
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