Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
