Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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