guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
