I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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