I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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