YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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