Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Small penises have feelings too.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
