so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
